I Love The Smell Of Bullshit In The Morning

I’m a couple days late on this but I can’t let a good piece of security theater go by unaddressed. So here we go.

I guess one good thing about the Casey Anthony verdict is that it was the shiny-sparkly thing our clueless media drones needed to pull them away from this ridiculous bit of fearporn.

I mean, really? “Body bombs”? Surgically implanted into terrorists to blow up planes? In Yemen? Does this make sense to anyone? This is just the kind of irresponsible nonsense our media does that makes me nuts.

As soon as I saw this story crop up on my Twitter feed I knew it was bullshit. The source is yet another one of those unnamed “U.S. officials” who “spoke on condition of anonymity” and of course we’re all reminded that there’s nothing to worry about — don’t cancel those summer vacation plans! — because there’s “no indication of an immediate plot,” but hey some Muslim-y guy might be carting a load of C4 around in his aorta!

God I hate this shit. For one thing, doesn’t it occur to anyone that there might be a hundred easier ways to do this than surgically implanting a bomb? You know, the ol’ up-the-butt thing or down-the-stomach thing? Isn’t that how they transport drugs? Haven’t we already heard a thousand times that airport body scanners can’t detect explosives in certain body cavities? Doesn’t this very story tell us that

Security experts said sewing a working bomb inside a passenger’s body would be possible though far-fetched. Such a device could be detonated wirelessly by a cellphone or radio-controlled trigger.

Rather than resorting to surgery, it would be easier to insert a bomb into a body cavity, as drug smugglers have done with their stashes for years, said Douglas Laird, a consultant and former head of security for Northwest Airlines.

Oh really? Well then why the fuck are you doing this story? What is the point of this?

I swear to God our media is so fucking irresponsible, I don’t even know where to begin. Because as soon as the story appeared it began to ricochet around the mediasphere, every mainstream outlet picked it up, and still if you Google “al qaeda surgically implanted bombs” it’s just everywhere (one outlet even suggested that explosives would be inserted in breast implants, which I like to call the Katy Perry Technique). This whole story is so thin to begin with, I have to think no one has any common sense.

And I also have to wonder why this obvious piece of fear propaganda was ginned up to begin with. Fear isn’t the motivator it once was, but still I can’t see a story like this and not suspect ulterior motives.

What’s really going on? Anyone want to take a guess?


Filed under media, rants, TSA

7 responses to “I Love The Smell Of Bullshit In The Morning

  1. Mom

    Your observations are very good dear but why do you have to use so much profanity? Surely other words would do as well. It is just so, well, common. Maureen Dowd doesn’t need to drop f-bombs, and neither do you. Love, Mother

  2. Well, my real Mom cussed like a sailor so I guess I come by it honestly.

  3. Ninja

    My mother burped like a sailor, she didn’t cuss like one. Anyway, my opinion is it is CIA dis-information plot, a morale ops kind of thing, as you generating as you say, perpetual fear. Either that or its a going to be in a new Hollywood blockbuster.

  4. “Damn damn damn damn damn ….”


    The new Hollywood blockbuster campaign is definitely likely, this is how they promote new TV series these days… Of course all we need is for Jack Bauer to wrestle the terrorist to the ground and pull the explosive out of his liver with his bare hands.

  5. Jim

    I think a TSA Agent is hoping he gets to squeeze women’s breasts to check for implanted bombs. The bigger the boobs the more likely they are bombs.

  6. Hmm, possibly, though I *do* think they have female agents search female passengers, and male agents search the men.

    I know you were kidding though. 🙂

  7. “Hmm, possibly, though I *do* think they have female agents search female passengers, and male agents search the men.”

    iT’s a PloT to allou teh LesBeonS to feeL up aRE wimen!!