Category Archives: gun control

Maybe It’s Time To Try Something New

Hmmm…. Something ain’t adding up.

The number of concealed carry permits in the U.S. has skyrocketed. The United States is the most heavily armed nation in the world. States have liberalized where one can carry in the past few years — in Tennessee, we now have guns-in-cars, guns-in-restaurants, guns-in-bars, guns-in-parks. We’ve also seen guns-in-churches and guns-on-campus movements (Oregon being one of several U.S. states where CCW holders can, and do, legally carry.)

All of this because “I need to protect myself and my family.” Okie dokie, but then how come we’re having more mass shootings? Clearly more guns isn’t working.

Maybe it’s time to try something new?


Filed under gun control, gun violence, Guns

Tennessee Gun Report

Time for another installment of Tennessee gunfail.

• September 28, 2015:

1- A Nashville man shot his 36-year-old girlfriend, thinking she was an intruder. She was supposed to be at work at the time. Oh, she died:

Lewis told officers that he was in the bedroom when he heard a noise, armed himself with a gun and went to investigate. He said he watched a figure exiting the kitchen area and fired one shot.

Crumpton was struck in the shoulder and was taken to Vanderbilt University Medical Center where she later died.

Lewis, who police said is unemployed, said he believed that Crumpton was at work at the time of the shooting. Crumpton’s two children, ages 17 and 14, who were in school when the shooting occurred, received support from police chaplains, Aaron said.

Lewis was in police custody Monday and, Aaron said, detectives are expected to charge him with homicide sometime later in the day.

Something that always comes up in these stories is, how do we really know if the guy thought she was an intruder? Couldn’t he be lying? Of course he could be lying. That was the whole Oscar Pistorius defense. He thought his girlfriend was an intruder, so he shot her through the bathroom door five times. Ladies, if your man keeps a gun “for protection” just remember: he can always “mistake” you for an intruder when things head south. Just a thought.

This is why all of the statistics show that a gun kept in the home “for protection” is actually more likely to be used to harm you or someone you love. NRA talking point FAIL.

2- Another responsible gun owner responsibly forgot they had a loaded handgun in their carry-on bag at the Nashville airport. So responsible!

• September 26, 2015:

This is interesting. A gun stolen from a Michigan family way back in 1982 was discovered in Covington, TN when someone tried to sell it. When the serial number was checked it was revealed the gun had been stolen.

• September 25, 2015:

1- A Knox County man accidentally shot himself in the hand at the gun store where he works:

Clyde Wallace “Wally” Johnson, identified by authorities as a “company executive” of Craig’s Firearm Supply, 8761 Chapman Highway, told police he was attempting to cycle a round into the chamber of a Glock handgun at the store when the gun fired and discharged a round through the palm of his right hand.

2- A Nashville high school student brings gun to school “for protection.”

• September 22, 2015:

Remind me why we want to arm college students?

A drunk University of Tennessee Chattanooga Mocs football player pulled a gun out of his pocket while Chattanooga police officers were arresting him for public intoxication at a house party on Sunday, according to court records.


• September 21, 2015:

A responsible gun owner responsibly forgot all about their loaded .22 in their carry-on bag at the Tri-Cities airport in Blountville.

• September 16, 2015:

Responsible Bartlett gun owners do the responsible thing, leave their guns in their cars overnight. What could possibly go wrong?

BARTLETT, Tenn. — Four more guns are in the wrong hands on Mid-South streets Wednesday.

Bartlett Police confirmed three cars were broken into over the weekend and four guns were stolen.


Police reports showed that all three cars that were broken into over the weekend were parked at home. Police reports suggested at least two of the three cars were left unlocked.

The man we spoke with admitted he left his car unlocked because he felt his neighborhood was very safe.

You thought your neighborhood was safe? Then why the fuck do you need a gun, moron?


Filed under gun control, Guns, Tennessee

Congratulations, Unidentified TX Man! You’re Our 2nd Amendment Hero Du Jour

One of what I am guessing to be our safest, most responsible citizens EVAH who knows one must always be in Condition White or be a parasite on society was pumping gas on Saturday night when a carjacking occurred. Being a good guy with a gun, he immediately intervened and opened fire on the attackers, when the utterly predictable happened:

When the assailants attempted to take his truck, a witness parked at the gas pump started shooting at the men, according to authorities.

Police said he accidentally shot the victim in the head.

Slow clap. Thanks for playing! Next time let them have the goddamn car. It’s easier to get a new car than a new brain.


Filed under gun control, gun violence, Guns

Ordinary, Everyday Gun Negligence

This is the kind of thing we warned about when the Tennessee Legislature forced guns-in-cars on us:

Several guns stolen from cars in Bartlett over weekend

BARTLETT, Tenn. — Four more guns are in the wrong hands on Mid-South streets Wednesday.

Bartlett Police confirmed three cars were broken into over the weekend and four guns were stolen.

One of the victims agreed to speak with WREG to prevent this from happening to others. He said he did not want to be identified because the crook or crooks are still out there.

“My stomach dropped. My heart sank,” he said.

The gun owner recalled the moment he saw the holster in his car was empty Sunday. The rag he used to cover the handle of the gun was on the seat.

You mean the magic invisibility rag you used to hide your gun didn’t work? Shocked face!

But this one for the win:

Police reports showed that all three cars that were broken into over the weekend were parked at home. Police reports suggested at least two of the three cars were left unlocked.

The man we spoke with admitted he left his car unlocked because he felt his neighborhood was very safe.

If your neighborhood is so safe, why the hell do you need a gun in the first place?


Look, let’s just dispense with this ridiculous notion that gun owners are in any way safer, more responsible, or more concerned about public safety than the average schlub who thinks if they leave a laptop in their car overnight with a jacket thrown over it, nobody will know it’s there.

You. Fucking. Idiots.

So thanks for playing, jerks. Now there are more guns in the hands of criminals — guns which may be used to kill an innocent person, a child perhaps. Because every gun used in a crime started its life legally. And this is precisely the kind of thing we told the Tennessee Legislature we were concerned about. But no, we were told that gun owners are so responsible, you guys!

And will there be charges filed for this negligence? Don’t be silly. They’re the victims, y’all!

I wish I could say this was a rare occurrence but sadly, no. Unsecured guns are stolen from cars (and homes) all the time. Sometimes this negligence is charged. Usually not. It all depends on our strange hodge-podge of state laws. Here in Tennessee if you lose your gun or if it’s stolen, you’re not even required to report it. So let’s just say negligent gun storage in Tennessee ain’t exactly viewed as a crime. How does this make sense? It doesn’t — unless you’re deep in the pockets of the Tennessee Firearms Assn. and required to pretend that all gun owners are the most responsible, most awesome citizens ever.

We have loosened pretty much every restriction on where you can carry a gun, but there’s been no attendant requirement related to responsible gun ownership. That’s how it is with the gun loons: all rights, no responsibilities.

And it’s not just guns in cars. Check out this useful idiot in Utahone of our safest, most responsible EVAH, needs to conceal-carry on his trip to the local Walmart because, shit, I dunno, maybe he’s scared of getting robbed or something. So what happens? He goes to the bathroom and gets robbed of his gun! Slow clap, asshole! If only you’d had a gun to protect yourse– ah, never mind.

Look, the more people walking around, driving around, carrying guns everywhere, the more shit like this is going to happen. Now after years of decline we’re seeing a rise in the murder rate, thanks to “a proliferation of arms.” Gee, it’s almost as if more guns everywhere doesn’t make anyone safer. Who knew?


Filed under gun control, gun violence, Guns, Tennessee

Tennessee Gun Report

I promised I’d get back on board with this …. still trying! Enjoy the parade of gunfail and lunacy.

• September 18, 2015:

A drunken 21-year-old fired shots at an ETSU fraternity house. Kids today.

• September 17, 2015:

1- Hey everyone! Check out my new gun! Oops, sorry about the shot to the head:

NASHVILLE, Tenn. (WKRN) – A 28-year-old woman was shot in the head and lives to tell the story. Despite all she has been through, Tara Ellis is staying positive.

Ellis was at an apartment complex in Bellevue with a group of people on Sept. 7 when the man who lives there showed his gun to everyone.

Metro police said another man was holding the gun when it accidentally went off, striking Ellis in the back of the head.

“We were at a friend’s apartment. We were about to go to the movies and that’s kind of the last thing I remember other than waking up with the paramedics,” said Ellis.


Ellis told News 2 she can’t see out of her left eye, she has no feeling on her left side and has to endure months of physical rehab.

“Washing my hair is a huge issue it’s really difficult you know it’s hard to wash my hands or open the refrigerator,” said Ellis.

Naturally she doesn’t have any insurance so there’s a GoFundMe campaign. Typical millennial, thought she was bulletproof.

2- A Meigs County man shot his uncle to death in an argument over a fighting rooster.

Respect the culture.

• September 13, 2015:

A woman was shot in the hand at a Nashville dog park.

This happened at the dog park that I go to, when I go to the dog park. Glad I wasn’t there.

• September 11, 2015:

Tennessee’s General Assembly really opened a can of worms when it passed “guns in parks.” That might be fine for people living in Bumfug TN but most of the population lives in cities and that’s a problem. The mayor of Knoxville decided to ban guns at the Tennessee Valley Fair and even Gov. Haslam agreed with the decision but the pants-wetters made a sadface. So far close to 150,000 attended the fair and yet nobody needed a 2nd Amendment Hero to come in and save the day.

I eagerly anticipate more such bullshit as we try to make sense of this idiocy. Already we’re going to have to go through metal detectors at the hockey game because Responsible Gun Owners are too confused about where they can and can’t bring their security blankets. How about just leaving them at home, folks?

• September 9, 2015:

1- A Nashville sixth-grader brought a gun to school and threatened another student if he told anyone.

2- A Clarksville woman was charged with trying to bring a loaded gun into the Montgomery County courthouse. You know, if it had been an airport she’d have been given a warning and it would have been written off as an “honest mistake.”

• September 8, 2015:

A Harrison man described as an “experienced” shooter accidentally shot himself while holstering his gun at the shooting range:

“One of our range members was out there shooting, and when he went to holster his gun, it went off. We’re not sure if he had his finger on the trigger, if the holster hit the trigger, or if his gun malfunctioned,” said owner, Kristi Manning.

The experienced shooter and long-time shooting range member was rushed to the hospital. Manning said the incident serves as a reminder to shooters of all skill sets.

“Don’t get careless. I mean, you can get yourself in such a situation where you’ve done it so many times. Like this gentleman, he’s done it so many times that, it just kind of happened. And it can happen to the best of us,” Manning said.

So much for “safest, most responsible ever.” Looks like complacency = gunfail, too. Guess guns just aren’t safe, no matter whose hands they’re in.


Filed under gun control, gun violence, Guns, Tennessee

Congratulations, Unidentified OK Boy! You’re Our 2nd Amendment Hero Du Jour

A Tulsa, Oklahoma 16-year-old nearly died after accidentally shooting himself in the leg over the weekend. He was saved by a police officer’s first aid:

The victim was conscious, police said, but he was incoherent, and there was a large amount of blood on his bed sheet. Police feared the victim had severed an artery, and an officer applied a tourniquet to the teen’s leg to stem the bleeding.

The teenager was taken to St. John Medical Center in serious condition. In a news release, police said the “quick action” of the officer who applied the tourniquet prevented the boy from bleeding to death.

But what elevates this story to Second Amendment Hero status, you may ask?

This was the second time the teen had accidentally shot himself with a handgun, police said. Officers responded to his residence three months ago and found him with another gunshot wound to the leg.

Perhaps the third time will be the charm. Slow clap, America!


Filed under gun control, Guns

Congratulations, Unidentified WI Man! You’re Our 2nd Amendment Hero Du Jour

A Janesville WI man taking a selfie with his new gun had an oopsie:

JANESVILLE—A Janesville man who had just bought a shotgun apparently wanted to share the news with the world early Saturday morning. He took a “selfie” photo of himself with his purchase.

The gun went off at 1:34 a.m., blasting into the next apartment in the 300 block of Memorial Drive, police said. No one was hurt.

The man, 19, called police and at first said the gun discharged as he was cleaning it, said police Sgt. Todd Kleisner.

He later admitted he was taking a selfie in front of his bathroom mirror, Kleisner said.

The birdshot pellets penetrated the wall and entered a neighboring apartment’s bathroom.

Just another day in America.

Last weekend we got a scare when we heard a gun go off in our neighborhood. Everyone came out of their houses to make sure neighbors were OK. Still have not been able to find out where it came from. At least our Wisconsin hero was responsible enough to call the police, even if he first lied about what happened.


Filed under gun control, Guns