Congratulations, Unidentified OK Boy! You’re Our 2nd Amendment Hero Du Jour

A Tulsa, Oklahoma 16-year-old nearly died after accidentally shooting himself in the leg over the weekend. He was saved by a police officer’s first aid:

The victim was conscious, police said, but he was incoherent, and there was a large amount of blood on his bed sheet. Police feared the victim had severed an artery, and an officer applied a tourniquet to the teen’s leg to stem the bleeding.

The teenager was taken to St. John Medical Center in serious condition. In a news release, police said the “quick action” of the officer who applied the tourniquet prevented the boy from bleeding to death.

But what elevates this story to Second Amendment Hero status, you may ask?

This was the second time the teen had accidentally shot himself with a handgun, police said. Officers responded to his residence three months ago and found him with another gunshot wound to the leg.

Perhaps the third time will be the charm. Slow clap, America!


Filed under gun control, Guns

Congratulations, Unidentified WI Man! You’re Our 2nd Amendment Hero Du Jour

A Janesville WI man taking a selfie with his new gun had an oopsie:

JANESVILLE—A Janesville man who had just bought a shotgun apparently wanted to share the news with the world early Saturday morning. He took a “selfie” photo of himself with his purchase.

The gun went off at 1:34 a.m., blasting into the next apartment in the 300 block of Memorial Drive, police said. No one was hurt.

The man, 19, called police and at first said the gun discharged as he was cleaning it, said police Sgt. Todd Kleisner.

He later admitted he was taking a selfie in front of his bathroom mirror, Kleisner said.

The birdshot pellets penetrated the wall and entered a neighboring apartment’s bathroom.

Just another day in America.

Last weekend we got a scare when we heard a gun go off in our neighborhood. Everyone came out of their houses to make sure neighbors were OK. Still have not been able to find out where it came from. At least our Wisconsin hero was responsible enough to call the police, even if he first lied about what happened.


Filed under gun control, Guns

Never Forget

Not The Onion:


Apparently there is no event in American history that won’t be cheapened by conservative intolerance, rampant consumerism and cheap beer. I really hope some Muslims take Florida Gun Supply up on this offer. I would love to see a family of Muslims show up and say “Yes, I’m a Muslim, and I would like to save $25 on this AR-15. So would my brother Hussein and my other brother Mohammad.” Hilarity would no doubt ensue.

Happy 9/11. I remember this as the last time any Republican president dared push for a “Star Wars” missile defense program. Remember, if you will, that right before 9/11 W had unilaterally withdrawn the United States from the Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty, all by hisownself, without the blessing of Congress. Remind me again how Obama can’t sign a peace treaty with Iran without Congress’ blessing but W could remove us from one?

Fellow Republican idiots like Sen. John Kyl of Arizona cheered W’s action. From the memory hole:

Senator Jon Kyl (R-AZ) also termed the move historic, but for a different reason, enthusiastically declaring June 13 that the United States “is no longer handcuffed to a policy that intentionally leaves its own people defenseless to missile attack.” Senators Chuck Hagel (R-NE) and James Inhofe (R-OK) also released statements supporting Bush’s act.

That’s all I remember from the news that summer: Republicans pushing for a bazillion dollar space missile shield, as if it was still the 1970s and our biggest threat was Russian nukes. That, and the news media distracting us with shiny-sparkly “shark attack!” news. That was the summer of 2001.

Democratic Senator Jack Reed of Rhode Island was the only Senator of either party to speak about the ABM Treaty on the Senate floor. Ominously:

Senator Jack Reed (D-RI) said the U.S. pullout was unwarranted because missile defense technologies that would have violated the treaty “are mere concepts that are years away.” He also said that terrorists are more likely to use means other than long-range ballistic missiles, such as planes and ships, to attack the United States.

Give that man a fucking medal. On 9/11 terrorists armed only with boxcutters attacked the U.S., thereby rendering the missile defense shield idea irrelevant and useless.

But the defense industry more than made up for that loss with our wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. The military buildup that followed 9/11 is still largely in place. We have more bases in more places than ever. And now we get to milk 9/11 to sell guns, Islamophobia, and beer, too.



Filed under Guns, religion

What Is The Point Of Fake News?

Okay, internet: someone please explain to me the purpose/goals of these fake news sites which proliferate across the internet, peddling stories that are just … well, wrong. They’re not even satire, they’re just stupid. Why do they exist?

I’m talking about ones like this fake NBC site, with the enticing URL “” that makes some bleary-eyed folks think it’s the real Recently this site stymied a lot of folks who should have known better by claiming the band “Survivor” was suing Kim Davis and Mike Huckabee over their song “Eye of the Tiger.” I see shit like this on peoples’ timelines and I just want to go nuts. These stories aren’t real! You look like an asshole for spreading them!

The fake news site National Report is another one. I’ve also seen fake New York Times urls.

These sites look real, and the misinformation goes viral as people who have been duped into thinking the news is real spread the false word via Facebook and Twitter. The stories have enticing headlines: “Christian Pastor In Vermont Sentenced To One Year In Prison After Refusing To Marry Gay Couple,” and “JetBlue To Begin Weighing Passengers” — stuff designed to gin up outrage and increase the viral hits. But they aren’t funny, they aren’t clever, they aren’t even satire. They’re just bullshit. And there are no ads on these sites, so what’s the fucking point?

Can anyone answer this question? Why? Just to fuck with people? To be mean? I don’t get it.

And why hasn’t the real sued?

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Filed under internet, media, media manipulation

Brilliant War On Terror Idea!

Here’s some stupidity straight out of — where else? — Florida:

A Florida gun maker is marketing an AR-15 carbine that he says will be “Islamic-free” because of the Bible verse he etches on each rifle. It’s aptly named “the Crusader.”

Each Crusader coming out of Spike’s Tactical in Apopka, Florida, is laser-etched on the right side of the rifle’s lower receiver with Psalm 144:1: “Blessed be the Lord my Rock, who trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle.”

On the left side, a cross and shield are etched.

Ben “Mookie” Thomas, spokesman for Spike’s Tactical, told Tampa Bay CBS-TV affiliate WTSP 10 News what led to the development of the Crusader:

“Right now, and as it has been for quite some time, one of the biggest threats in the world is and remains Islamic terrorism,” Thomas, who is a former Navy SEAL and former Blackwater security contractor, told the station. “We wanted to make sure we built a weapon that would never be able to be used by Muslim terrorists to kill innocent people or advance their radical agenda.”

This idiot might do better to inscribe his guns with an incantation I mean Bible verse keeping them away from toddlers, wife abusers, and garden-variety criminals.



Filed under Christianity, Guns, Islam, religion, religious right

Nashville Mayor’s Race Gets Ugly

Election night update:

Going negative failed.

Dear David Fox: you had me at “focus on our infrastructure” and “we don’t want to be Atlanta.” You lost me at the pathetic “Megan Barry is a godless liberal” BS.

For my non-Nashville readers, we in Music City will elect a brand-new mayor on Thursday. The incumbent was term-limited, so August’s general election presented voters with a large buffet of fresh faces. Now we have a runoff between the top two contenders: Megan Barry, most recently an at-large councilmember, and David Fox, a hedge fund guy and former chair of our school board.

Nashville’s mayoral races are non-partisan, though Nashville is a blue dot in red Tennessee. This means most viable candidates for office are usually Democrats — or at least they say they are. And in my 30 years in this town I’ve always known our mayoral races to be mostly drama-free affairs. Not this time, though.

The first sign this campaign was headed to crazy town was when Fox’s wife, Carrington Fox, appeared in ads saying Barry championed causes that are the “extreme issues of the social left.” What those causes may be are left to the imagination. Doesn’t matter.

The message was clear: Barry is a LIBERAL. Gasp.

Not long after that, the Fox campaign started running radio ads in African-American markets calling Barry an atheist.

OH. A godless liberal.

Now we’ve hit a new low with some ex-councilmembers of the conservative persuasion making the ludicrous claim that Barry omitted “under God” every time she recited the Pledge of Allegiance at the opening of council meetings.

And I guess she forgot to wear a flag pin, too?

This ridiculous labeling — liberal, atheist, godless liberal — is extraordinary for a mayoral race in Nashville. It’s the kind of thing one is more accustomed to seeing in hotly contested senate races, even presidential races. The fact that Fox is working with conservative groups out of Texas may explain some of this strategy. Others have suggested Fox’s real ambition is the governor’s seat, and this mayoral race is just a “branding” exercise toward higher, statewide office. Maybe.

I will say, there is an awful resonance to these attacks on Megan Barry. Are we really wondering if she says “under God” when she recites the Pledge of Allegiance? What next, rumors that she’s a secret Muslim? Studied at a madrassa? Maybe she was born in Kenya, too? Hey, David Fox: should we ask to see her birth certificate?

These are ugly, personal attacks, and while they don’t have the same racial undertones of the right-wing’s attacks on President Obama, they come from the same place. Label the opposition as “other,” “different,” and “not one of us.”

In other words: Unfit for office.

This is Politics 101 for national races. Making it a part of our supposedly non-partisan local races? Uh-uh. You lost me. Voting for David Fox is endorsing the kind of smear tactics that have infected our national discourse for the past 8+ years. Do I want this dirty pool to pollute my city? No, thanks.


Filed under Nashville, politics

Conservatism Will Never Run Out Of Martyrs

I’m really tired of talking about/hearing about Kim Davis. This useful idiot has raised a lot of money for the religious right’s sad attempt to copy the ACLU, Liberty Counsel. And a lot of my liberal friends have taken to Facebook to point out how theologically incorrect Liberty Counsel and Kim Davis are, that nowhere does the Bible state that marriage is between one man and one woman (in fact, during the marriage equality debate several Biblical scholars pointed out that “Biblical marriage” is anything but what religious conservatives want it to be), and that Davis is a hypocrite herself. Yada yada, blah blah.

None of that matters, people. All of that is just silly yammering. Once again, liberals are arguing a point of logic and fact, while conservatives are arguing hurt fee fees about losing another battle in the culture wars. Look: the fight over gay marriage and the subsequent martyrdom of Kim Davis has zero to do with the Bible. It’s not about religion or theology. Like all culture war issues, it’s about conservatives’ lack of cultural relevance. It’s about how they’ve lost the culture wars and the poor dears just can’t deal with it.

Boo fucking hoo.

What we on the left really should do, every time a Kim Davis or Josh Duggar or Cliven Bundy pops up on the radar, is ignore them. Show them how irrelevant they truly are by not giving a shit about their martyrdom because they are irrelevant losing losers who lost.

Oh, I know it will never happen, right wing martyrs are like oxygen to social media. But not everything on Facebook or Twitter matters. In fact, most of it is as lasting as a fart on the breeze. So while Kim Davis may be a trending topic now, I guarantee you that by this time next year we’ll have forgotten all about her. Does anyone remember Crystal and Kevin O’Connor? Raise your hand if you had to Google the name.

Conservatism will never run out of martyrs because conservatives are perpetually oppressed. That’s what happens when you’ve lost cultural relevance: everything is always against you because you’re on the wrong side of everything. You lost and that sucks, but the right-wing machine thrives on martyrs, so we will continue to hear their tales of woe. They will continue to appear on Fox News and hatriot radio, they will raise money for groups like Liberty Counsel and the Alliance Defense Fund, and they will continue to proclaim their martyrdom because the woe-is-me attention is the only sense of relevance they’ll ever have.

Bless their hearts. I just wish we didn’t have to pay attention.


Filed under Christian Right, Christianity, gay equality, GLBT, religion, religious right