It’s The Ron Paul Family Cookbook!

Not a hoax, apparently this is a real thing. You gotta love a cookbook that includes a chicken recipe submitted by a vegetarian. What could possibly go wrong?

Mrs. Sciulli, despite being a vegetarian, contributed to the 2009 edition Golfer’s Chicken, a dish made of chicken parts coated with powdered onion soup mix, salad dressing and apricot jam. “You have to fall off the wagon now and again,” she said.

I think I just threw up in my mouth.

Or this:

For the traditional White House Super Bowl Party, what about Spicy Crackers? The cookbook says they are simple: Empty a box of saltine crackers into a jug, add 1½ cups of oil, 3 tablespoons of crushed red pepper flakes and a package of dry Ranch dressing mix. Roll the jug around to mix the contents, “allow the crackers to set for several hours and then, enjoy!”

I’d love to but I’m still trying to figure out how to get the damn saltines inside a jug.

This cracked me up:

Peggy Paul said some Ron Paul supporters have told the family they framed their cookbooks. “But then,” she said, “how would you use it?”

Indeed! Then again, the executive chef of Washington’s Ritz-Carlton hotel told the Wall Street Journal he tried a few of the recipes and thinks the book is better framed on the wall than used for meal planning.

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9 Comments

Filed under food, Ron Paul, weird stuff

9 responses to “It’s The Ron Paul Family Cookbook!

  1. Joe

    Eh, I’ll take the 1955 Women’s Press Club cookbook I told you about with the recipe from J. Edgar Hoover (Washington’s “most eligible bacholor”!) for Popovers or LBJ’s home made ice cream. These pale in comparison – not surprisingly. One of these days, someone going to grab this gem off my bookstore shelf!

  2. ThresherK

    Joe,

    When I saw “chicken coated with onion soup mix” I already was thinking “1955” or thereabouts.

    • In all fairness, my mother used onion soup mix in lots of things. It’s one of the things that set her delicious meat loaf apart from others; that and the ketchup/mustard/brown sugar glaze!

      • Blech. I know we all grew up eating crap — I remember Swanson’s TV dinners with “Salisbury steak,” a “vegetable medley” and that apple cinnamon dessert thingie. But fer crying out loud, that’s before we knew better! My rule of thumb is, if I cannot pronounce any of the ingredients, I ain’t eating it.

        Anyway, I’m a huge make-your-own type. I’d no sooner buy a package of dehydrated chemical waste flavored to resemble salty onions than I’d stick a fork in my eye. These days you can buy all of the spices and other ingredients — including dehydrated onions — and whip up your own in some Greek-style yogurt, without the MSG, disodium guanylate, disodium inosinate, partially hydrogenated vegetable oils, hydrolyzed soy protein and — what Frankenfood would be complete without it? — CORN SYRUP that’s in the stuff Lipton’s hawks.

        Do not eat that crap, people. Unless you want to end up senile like Ron Paul, and with serious abdominal and heart problems like his wife. Free hand of the market, indeed.

      • ThresherK

        If you want to gooor-may up “California Dip”, Alton Brown does a nice job.

        It’s part of our Rose Parade ritual.

  3. “disodium guanylate”

    Twice salted batshit made into a coffee drink?

    • disodium guanylate:

      Disodium guanylate, also known as sodium 5′-guanylate and disodium 5′-guanylate, is a natural disodium salt of the flavor enhancer guanosine monophosphate (GMP). Disodium guanylate is a food additive with the E number E627.[1] It is commonly used in conjunction with glutamic acid (monosodium glutamate, MSG).

      As it is a fairly expensive additive, it is not used independently of glutamic acid; if disodium guanylate is present in a list of ingredients but MSG does not appear to be, it is likely that glutamic acid is provided as part of another ingredient such as a processed soy protein complex. It is often added to foods in conjunction with disodium inosinate; the combination is known as disodium 5′-ribonucleotides.

      Disodium guanylate is produced from dried fish or dried seaweed and is often added to instant noodles, potato chips and other snacks, savoury rice, tinned vegetables, cured meats, and packaged soup.

      Google is your friend.

      • Only if I REALLY want to know what it is { ;>)

        There are two sorts of ingestible foodstuffs. The one sort, which most of us strive to eat, came out of the ground or its mommy. The other sort, the Twinkies sort comes from the same place as Agent Orange.