Tea Party Dumbasses

In my neighborhood people are having serious flooding issues from “infill” development — that’s where they tear down one house and put two, three or four on the same lot. Naturally the extra paving and loss of grass causes drainage problems for neighbors and right now Nashville regulations don’t require developments of under 10,000 square-feet to file a stormwater plan. That’s going to change because we’re not fucking idiots in this city, but not if people like my dumbass Tea Party neighbor have their way. My neighbor informed me that city stormwater regs are “big government” and people just need to individually take care of their perimeter and all will be well.

“Build a wall” he said because, really, what could possibly go wrong?

So here’s my suggestion: clearly you people are too dumb for urban living. Why not move out to the country and get yourself 25 acres or so. Something where you can bootstrap yourselves all the livelong day and just pat yourselves on the back for being so self-sufficient and individualistic and all.

Then you won’t have to worry about living in close quarters with neighbors, unless of course your neighbors happen to be Muslims, and then you can pop your copy of the Constitution in the shredder and eminent domain yourselves silly.

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9 Comments

Filed under Nashville, religion, Tea Party, Tennessee

9 responses to “Tea Party Dumbasses

  1. Martin Norred

    If you could persuade him to build a wall around his property, he just might have a nice sized swimming pool(not necessarily exactly where he would prefer it to be).

  2. democommie

    Minor quibble. “Teaparty dumbass” is a redundancy.

    Do these people who are afflicted with ODS* know what’s in their insurance polices.

    I don’t know about where you live, but in most places if your area demonstrates a propensity for being flooded, the cost of insurance to cover that eventuality tends to skyrocket. Then again, that would be the invisible fist of the market gut punching those idiots.

    * Obama Derangement Syndrome

    • Apparently my neighbor keeps confusing his HOA with the city. Every time he gives me a detailed complaint about “big government” it’s always his HOA, not the govt, he’s complaining about.

      I’ll never forget the time when a different Tea Party Dumbass neighbor of mine showed up at a neighborhood meeting to rail against the local (private, Christian) college buying up property in the neighborhood. She didn’t understand why the city couldn’t just pass a law against that sort of thing.

      Umm ….

      • GregH

        Kind of hard to throw a stick in Nashville without hitting a private, Christian college, between Belmont, Lipscomb and Treveca Nazarene. Sheesh! Between Lifeway, Thomas Nelson and the Methodists, it’s getting so you can’t go to strip joint or a liquor store without running into somebody who works for a Christian education or publishing. [evil snicker] Don’t even get me started about all the contemporary Christian music folks – guys trying to channel Keith Urban and Jesus simultaneously. Oh, sorry to go OT. You were talking about *TEA PARTY* dumbasses, right?

      • You forgot Aquinas College, which is just up the street from the Free Will Baptist Bible College, and then there’s the American Baptist College in north Nashville.

        Though I must say, Belmont is barely religious anymore. They long ago did away with their religious requirements to graduate and a couple years ago changed their board of directors requirements so that board members no longer have to be Baptist. And I think they officially severed ties with the Baptist church over that incident.

      • GregH

        Buckle of the Bible Belt we are.

      • Bitter Scribe

        I wonder if it’ll ever occur to him to get involved with his HOA if he disagrees with it so much, and try to influence it. Nah. That would require some work, while being stupid is effortless.

      • Today he told me he’s the HOA president. Which, considering how clueless he is about this stuff, has me wondering ….

  3. democommie

    “guys trying to channel Keith Urban and Jesus simultaneously. Oh, sorry to go OT. You were talking about *TEA PARTY* dumbasses, right?”

    I think that the Venn Diagram for those two demographics looks like the MasterCard logo.